Carrietta White

today was fun naman. Though I walked a thousand miles(literally), I am still relieved that it wasnt an awkward encounter with boys. But Me and Rachel first ate in Mcdo , then we went walking to MORO. That's where we saw them. It was fun..ü I got to see the different side of Rachel. The Rachel I've always wanted to meet that I just met today. I feel happy and grateful to have her by me. ANyway, I also got to bond with the boys. haha. but there's gotta be more to them I know it... so there...

Ive been thinking about my life lately.. and honestly its in tangles... Blahdublahdiblah.. i can't even think of what to type in here... :P oh well.. til next time

i watched it with my mom yesterday in eastwood. I liked it because it was a very quiet film which will really allow you to penetrate a a value from each scene... It was also very honest, in dialogue.. not much pretensions and straight to the point. I was paying attention all throughout the film because the pacing was also fast. I say 5 thumbs up to clint eastwood, and hilary swank, and to the movie!ü

I also bought gazillion of chips for the beach tom.!!ü hahaü YUMYUM! FATS!! I'll look fat in that green bathing suit..hahaaü nyways... ill get a tan... wuhoo.. hopefully it will be EVEN. or else... ill die! Yeah.. so there... were 3 nlang.. oh well..!! SUMMER FUN!!ü


BATANGAS HERE WE COME!

Current Mood: excited

It will always be a question. If I'm in love....

1.Letting him hold my hand..
2.Staring at our picture together every second..
3.Constantly checking my phone for his text messagesü
4.Wanting to talk to him everyday
5.Defending him from my friends.. even if they keep on saying he's so ugly... *sigh* ugly guys rock!
6.Day-dreaming about us.. hahaü

and the list goes on.. but I think I am officially in love...ü Enough said..ü Go figure why we have a joint account...

Current Mood: loved
Current Music: I love rock n Roll

Pano na yan?! Shit. Yesterday, I messed up practically 2 of my exams.. and now, I didnt even study hard coz' I was talkin to him. Oh God, what is happening to me.? I'm losing my focus and i MUST get it back, esp. tom. is MATH... shit tlga.. argh.... Im dead on APRIL.

I cant say nything else. Im just super scared.

Current Mood: anxious

Okay, haven't updated for the longest time.. here are tidbits of info during the past week:

1.PROM is OVER. It was okay, but not quite. I didn't get to dance. We just chattered the whole night, and it was super noisy so we had to get away from the booming speakers which were right beside us. Oh! im so excited to get our PROM pics!ü
2.Ive been studying quite hard for the exams because I'm getting scared that I might not get into UP since 40% of your highschool grade will be considered.
3.Friends are okay.
4.My tummy hurts like hell... it's probably because it's exams..
5.Im officially a survey addict in friendster...
6.I am distracted...

*bow*

I haven't had this much work since summer... I mean, summer was leisurely tiring but now it's tired from BORING work.. Well, okay lang.. Btw, I just got home an hour ago from F&L practice and it's 9:20 already... grr.. nyways, Im now thinking about school again tom., PROM, Exams and the last and the least I like, IP defense(it's a good thing we're not wearing formal attire, uniform nalang). Gawd, tapos at last!! GIMIK sa 10!! wuhoo!! :) Ill really go with cla celyuh and cams!! I need to breathe naman... tapos that same day, I'll sleep agad when I get home... Hay.. anyway, these are the things I have to do later after i go offline:

1.Clothes for F&L, ANd Campaign for SocSci
2.Study for English and Math..
3.Gather notes for Exams....
4. sleep asap

nyways,, got to move... ill update maybe after I get through this obstacle course... haha cheap joke aryt bye

Current Music: MYMP

First of all, it wasn't in the plan that he'll pick me up in school.. He just really wanted to see where my house is.... so he did. Then, he also came into to my house initially, only to bring my bag.. but then, he also got to eat dinner... but I think he really needed it because he didn't know that it was that far from the gate.. I wonder what happened to him when he walked? kawawa..

I'm happy.... and nothing will ever bring me downü

I have been missing this feeling for a super long time na!ü It's really great and I can sleep super soundly tonight. I have one concern though that I know I shouldn't even think about, ..SUNDAY..Yes, he's not the hottest guy around, but that is the point, he's not the hottest guy and therefore I should make the most out of it. I mean, I can handle this... ü It's nothing.. haha yeah right!ü Okay, tomorrow is like, friday, and two more days after tom... haha... There... I have created this whole mess and i promise myself to clean this up then Im out... I dont like him THAT much anymore... I mean, after the prom, I'm not really interested in seeing him anymore... Im so mean, i know, but Im too young and besides, I don't want any distractions right now because Im trying to struggle in math na nga... trying to struggle... not trying to study.. that's how ignorant i am in the subject called mathematics. Darn, im super bored right now.... im just killing time... chatting away my sorrow and despair... my confusion... but... in fact, im just hella bored,, haha... what a nice poem.. okay, im getting weird na.....

Time goes on real fast. I was just waiting for his text and suddenly it's wednesday. Haha, he did reply but I don't want to respond anymore, too tamad.ü

It's so cool that we both like the book, "5 people you meet in heaven". We're also planning to take up BS Psychology. But I know these are all tentative. But still, it's so nice to know that we both have dreams and plans that are somehow similar to each other. I feel like he's more hardworking than me, though. He's an honor student and I'm far from that. This is a good motivation for me to strive harder.ü

Current Mood: blank

My excitement has momentarily fleeted. Maybe it's because I can't connect to MSN but I think it's more of the realizations I had during the Human Sexuality Talk. Seriously, Im not trying to be funny but It's really sad. I can't believe I'm just infatuated with Usher. It's not that it's sad but I feel foolish for thinking that it's REAL, u know, what's going on bet. the 2 of us. This really gave me more focus on thingsü like school... okay enough about school...
We had an interesting discussion in English about a poem of hiding one's feelings and forgetting to be and authentic person. Natamaan yta akoü I mean, honestly, everyone is wearing this mask just to blend in society. It's really hard for me to accept this reality especially because I hate gossip. Okay, I may be a hypocrite but even if I hear gossip, I just get all moody. I feel for the people being talked about. I'm too banal.. haha...ü Pero, that's one sickness that I'd really want to remove from the Filipino culture. It's very degrading and I think it's such a waste of time. Oh well, better think about this some other time... Which reminds me, I have to do my CL reaction paper, LAB experiment paper... ETC....ü

Current Mood: contemplative

Okay... I was a bit too paranoid to be thinking that Usher knows he's Usher.... Praise the Lord Almighty!!ü

Okay, I'm really getting impatient of the gift they'll give me.They all know and not telling me! It's really unfair. :\ I bet it's some kind of scrapbook or something... I really don't have any clue.ü I can't deny that I'm super excited though, hahaü

I must finish my book for english, because I just realized the week after next week is the due date. I must review for exams. Wahh. I must buy a nice prom dress. I must convince my mom that I don't need a chaperone.It's really pathetic. ugh.

Things I have to do this week:
1.Talk to Jorella
2.Buy a Prom Dress
3.Start organizing and reviewing my notes
4.Get my freakin CL notebook back
5.African Salt
6.Finish book
7.Start I.W.
8.Prepare for major embarrasment on sunday

the things I have to do just to make life function well...
its sad really..

Current Mood: too much things to do
Current Music: Joss Stone

Though my day started off quite awfully, it didn't matter anymore. I was just such in a happy mood today and not in the mood to feel bad... but omg... im utterly shocked by Usher knowing that he's usher.... wahh.... must get out of it...

Current Mood: busy

This can't be happening. My tongue slipped last night, and I finally told mom about Aaron asking me to his prom. I am freaked out to tell you the truth. My mom never involved herself in things like ... boys.... Well, it wasn't surprising that she got shocked and started questioning me about him. SO I pretended to keep my cool and laugh my way out of this undying embarrasment.. Oh, and I'd have to reckon with meeting his mom and him meeting my mom.. IN MY HOUSE... what will I do? What if he doesn't speak up and I end up filling the dead air... Okay, I know it's not a good idea to panic at this point since she's willing to agree, but I'm really not fully awake and aware of what's really going on. I pray to God that nothing will go wrong. please..

Current Mood: Prom-mom

oh.. so this is how we play the game...ü like, u ask me what cake u are for me.... and you'll know if I still like you... very smart and trickyü hahaü here goes:
Cake equivalents
Blackforest- love mo
Chocolate- special someone
Strawberry Cheescake- soulmate
Ube-enemy
mocca- textmate
choco mousse- career(? i dont get what this means?)
cheese- friend
mango- crush...
Balugs txted me that and I answered black forest.. of course w/o my knowledge, it was that... eew.. and I think he took it seriously, which is not.. :P Then I asked him back, but of course he knew the answers so to make the situation even stickier and corny, he replied, "Blackforest and chocolate".... eew... double grossness tlgaü Anyway, I couldn't say anything to Aaron so I texted him the cake question and he replied choco mousse... which is sadly, career... I don't get what that means talaga i swear... The term is kind of kanto language.. uhh i hate it..!! :P anyway, I told him he's Ube for me, enemy... ya... eh ugly naman cake nya for me...ü im just returning the favor, right?! ya...ü

okay, im promised to do all the things Listed on my organizer, but this has to be my cheat day..ü I just did what's due for tom. and that is the lab. expt. about froggies and yeah, im waiting for the i.p. to be emailed to me.. I have to do I.W. tom. and oh yah, i just remembered I have to bring pictures for CL I.W... haha out of the blueü Thereü

WE have been texting for 17 days now... its official..ü haha..ü but sadly, not yet THAT official...ü I think I can't go to his prom anymore and I don't want to either because it's hassle(prom dress, shoes, hair) and Ill have to go through a series of reprimandments(is there such a word) from my mom... It'll just make me even more stressed out... I mean, hello?! exams are like a few weeks ahead... I have to start reviewing na nga ehü Gosh, I can't imagine how Ill ever finish reviewing if SocSci alone is comprehensive and detailed... :(... ahh.... the downside of being a teenager... So I'll have to sacrifice my own happiness for the sake of my grades and my mom... this really makes me sad..

I wonder what'll happen on friday.. I guess nothing really...It'll be fast lang naman eh... Ill just watch a movie... then go home..? haha?.. what a way to celebrate MY BDAYü I don't even care about gifts na nga eh... coz' I have $500 naman to buy stuff for myself so its all good ;) Thanks to my ever loving Japanese daddyü So ill end it here... im really tired... and ill sleep early...

.... I look into your eyes, so far away, there's trouble on your mind, you're losing faith.... let me hold you, it'll be alrightü

Current Mood: MADLY

I really feel bad for going out a lot coz' I've been forgetting to read books na... I feel like grammar is getting worse everyday and I really need to read. Yesterday, we were suppose to compose a story for English about this song, "breaking someone's heart is never easy".. or something like that.. It's super hard to fathom because of the guy's super raspy and unclear voice!ü annoying!ü So, I just created this story about an old woman, recalling her life as a grumpy, single and problematic girl.. Very diff. from her peers and likes to cover up her insecurities and weaknesses by putting on a strong front..ü The story starts like that and I'm having a problem of putting my thoughts into words, ahh I really need to read soon...ü SO anyway, enough about that, let's now go to the fun stuff... uh... yeah, usher, didnt reply to me last night... annoying, but it's okay, i guess he was sleeping or something.. I don't really know where tu put him, dork, or just plain smart. Ive accepted the fact that he's far from HOT but I just hope he's not an authentic geek in school.... sigh... you just can't get everything in life... :( Well, at least he's nice and knows how to care for girls...ü Oh, his sister is super niceü She invited me pa sa gs fair... cute nga ehü there..ü I guess that recaps my thoughts this morning... Man, my thought are clear in the morning pala..ü haha nyways... til next time

Current Mood: cheerful
Current Music: Alicia Keys

Too many things happening within so little time... I am not used to this.
1.USHER YEAH YEAH.... CONFESSIONS....
2.Movie and conflict bet. my friends
3.MATH :(
4.EXAMS
5.BOOK REPORT and i haven't even started reading the book
6.I.W. ahhh one more day for 3 subjects impossibleü
7.im selling my cellphone(yey)
8.im buying stuff coz dad sent me $500
9.AHS PROM
10.FAIR OF SIC..... wahhh
11. WOUNDED face...

Why cant life become easier... Im starting to dwell on people again. Like him.. Ah.. okay Ill see him again on Friday.. What will happen? I don't know yet.. We're going to watch a movie... weird.. ano kaya maganda?.. there...ü My mom allowed me since its my bday.. thereü He's not yet replying to me coz I think he's sleepy.... sadü pero duh, we'll see each other naman... Im trying not to get too attached coz i dont want to be hurt nymore.... hay nako.... bye gnyt... kung hei fat choi

Current Mood: groggy

Hey.... it wasnt that fun last friday, but it was okay thanks to Usher...ü We got to walk around alone and we got to sit under the stars together...ü It was like a dream..ü Luckily, I was sleepy so I had the guts to sing .. He also sang, "crazy for you"... it was super sweet but I couldn't look at him..ü hahaü

So we had our confessions... ü nux, usher tlgaü bsta, u know... Then suddenly all his friends and mine came and they were all noisy.. :P it was super embarrasing... so afterwards, We decided to go to the stairs and wait for our sundos there... I was left behind and I was like bringing 5 bags... so usher wanted to help me carry them... it was crazy coz i knew my mom would be over reacting.. if she saw him... But still, super kulit niya, he really wanted to help me... so there.. eventually he brought me to my car... and then, i introduced them and i said bye...ü weird tlga..ü what a way to end the day..ü I don't know if he really likes me or what... Im not hoping na coz I know the implications if I do... Anyway, we have a long way to go...

Current Mood: loved

Yeah, u guessed it right... the day's really boring...ü All we did was talk about friday..ü I also ate Mariel's super soft and chewy candy, it was super juicy.. I want more!!

Ten things I like about today
1.It wasn't that tiring
2.I got an E in Social Science quiz
3.I think of Usher(yeah,yeah)
4.I think of My dress for the sophnight
5.I think of my birthday
6.I won 2nd place(basta)
7.I ate little(im starting na up to fri.)
8.I saw Spongebob
9.I got to play the recorder in the right way(for once)
10.Ate Mariel's Candy

Ten things I hate about today
1.No computer class
2.I didnt study for English so I guess I failed
3.The thought that I need to entertain 2 guys.... sick...:P
4.Seeing Ms. Alicando's taray expressions
5.Not well rested
6.No one texted me :(
7.I can't seem to send Marga the pic
8.Bad hair day
9.Sluggish day
10.Nothing happy about today

so long farewell im off to see the wizard, the wonderful wizard of Oz

Current Mood: moody
Current Music: my irregular breathing

Gee, how will I ever ever get over guys I meet... It's like i have the after sunrise/sunset syndrome.... I am so weird. Well, duh, of course I am.ü tin is super hot pala. He looks like Usher..ü I can't believe I spent 7 hours with Usher... nuxü Of course, there was the talking to him, flirting with him, goofing around with him, and glancing at him 5 times in 10 seconds... I think lang, that he found it very obvious that I liked him.. I'm sure of it he doesn't like me... I also saw in friendster that he likes diff. girls weekly... that makes me really sad... *pout*.. He's not that diff. after all.. but what the hell! He's hot, nice, and did I mention, smart? B-boy eh...ü I don't want to hope na nga eh.... He will NEVER EVER CALL ME or MENTION MY NAME AGAIN..... HE DOESN'T LIKE ME,HE FINDS ME UGLY.... harsh huh?... But you know, he talked to me.... i talked to him.... I think it's enough to think that we established something, even if it's only friendship... here I go again, all preachhy-mushy... Hay, basta... I'm so tired of looking for love in the wrong places and times... It's so frustating.. It's like I'm getting to copy the fate of Ate also... Parang it's too much... I think I don't wanna be single til im 30... excuse moi...
Of course, I still don't want to get married but I wanna fall in love before im 20 naman..I mean truly fall in love, not just puppylove, boy meets girl crushes...Ive had a million na... Over na... But really... it's all been messed-up commitments and shallow ones... I really hate myself for that... Hay lifeü

I'll wait here for love, even if it means dying from waiting...

Current Mood: gloomy
Current Music: Nat King Cole's "my Love"